Sent Does Not Mean Received
Raise your hand if you're ready for ANOTHER communication conversation.
Nah.
Me either.
So does that mean that we've achieved the "expert" communication level and we simply don't need any further tips or suggestions?
… or does it mean we've thrown in the towel and have settled for the "working with what I've got, hoping for the best" mentality when it comes to communication?
Between the opposite ends of that spectrum, there's a lot of understanding and wisdom to gain, and because we don't shy away from the hard things, we're diving in! Let's go!
Communicating virtually presents its own set of challenges, and no matter how many people I speak with each week, this subject comes up more than any other. EVERYONE lists "great communication" in the top 3 needs within their business and for their team. Both sides of the aisle (client + VA) recognize that strong communication skills are vital. At the same time, nearly 100% of the questions we field and the issues we help with involve… You guessed it - some form of broken communication!
"The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place." George Bernard Shaw.
Let's tackle some misconceptions about communication.
Saying what you want to say is not communicating.
Email is not communicating.
Compiling a list of tasks into a prioritized list is not communicating - and neither is systematically checking off the boxes.
Great Communication vs. Poor Communication
So often, people unload everything on their minds, and away they go with the illusion that they have communicated. (I call this dump truck leadership.) This might include sharing a to-do list or assigning a new project. Perhaps it's handing out feedback or sending an answer to a question.
If this has been your style in the past and you've got a goal to be a better leader and communicator, keeping this in mind is a great first step: How you say and mean something isn't necessarily how someone hears it. Ask yourself these questions:
Where is your focus -- on yourself? …or on the other person?
Saying the right words in the wrong way delivers the wrong message. THINK ABOUT SENDING AN EMAIL WITH THE CAPS LOCK ON. Is that how you came across when delivering your message?
Communication is so much more than the words we say. It involves three parts:
55% body language
38% tone and volume
7% words you say (!!!)
From Webster's 1828 Dictionary, one of the definitions of communication is the "interchange of knowledge; correspondence; good understanding between men."
"Good understanding between men."… let's linger here for a minute. To me, this implies teamwork. We. Not I and you, but we. We understand the issue, the project, the next steps… etc. We know and are on the same page, working toward the same goal.
This also implies alignment. Task lists, to-do items, and new assignments are the things we love to handle, and we do so with passion -- especially when there is alignment and good understanding. Taking time to explain the goal and your expectations regarding timelines, aesthetics, client experience, etc., ensures everyone is on the same page and working with the same goals in mind.
Receiving feedback is also something that a great teammate appreciates and needs when working together with a specific goal in mind. Don't forget to ask if your teammates have any feedback to offer. Collaboration is the best thing about having a team. If you walk away without complete communication, you may miss out on what makes this project reach a successful end quickly and easily.
Another definition from Webster's 1828 Dictionary is this: In rhetoric, a trope by which a speaker or writer takes his hearer or speaker as a partner in his sentiments and says we, instead of I or you.
Again, we see the implication of teamwork or partnership.
Your role in communication is to ensure that the message you want to convey is heard and understood.
I'm not sure that is always at the forefront of our minds when we're speaking with others. So often, I hear things like, "I sent the information in an email, and she replied, so I know she got the message.", or "I sent the Slack message two days ago." Sent doesn't always mean received. This is especially true with something like a Slack message or text. Rarely do these types of messages paint the entire picture or clearly state expectations … they're more like a drive-by or a 50/50 message: 50 mph, 50 feet away. Have your catcher's mitt on because we're comin' in hot!
Being clear and direct is not only okay; it must be THE GOAL! At Rock Solid, our VAs are the best of the best. It's a fact that I can't overstate. However, even with the bar raised THIS high, we're still not great at mindreading! Expecting someone to gather clues, discern your mood or energy, and know what you're thinking or need at any given moment is unrealistic at best and disastrous at worst.
Did they hear what you meant? Before the conversation ends, you might want to ask, "Tell me what you heard." You've given the assignment, discussed all the parts involved, taken the time to answer any questions, and formulated a plan. Your job is to ensure they understand! Let's be sure everyone understands and is on the same page before execution begins. Nobody can work with passion and intentionality until there is clarity!
"People will forget what you said. They'll never forget the way you made them feel." John Maxwell
If this all feels very heavy and you're getting the idea that being a leader involves a lot of hand-holding or micromanaging, then I'm not clearly communicating! Everyone wants to work with a teammate who takes strong initiative and is highly proactive. This happens only when great communication is in place, and you've equipped and empowered them with the appropriate tools and details. Work becomes seamless and feels effortless and enjoyable. When issues arise, they're quickly resolved without offense or resentment. Great communication is the foundation every strong team builds upon!
Finally, methods of communication for your virtual team:
We have more communication channels than ever right now. So… what is the problem? Using the right tool at the right time for the right project makes ALL the difference. Let's talk about four specific communication tools required for great teamwork:
Voxer
I often hear people avoid using Voxer because they don't like the sound of their own voice. If that's you, I have the best news: you don't have to listen to your own messages! This is possibly one of my favorite tools that I use with my incredible team. We can hear voice intonation and emotion (38% of communication is tone and volume), and it provides a connection point other than reading a text - which gets old quickly and is the number one area of communication breakdown. It's wonderful for quick questions, daily rundowns, and relationship-building! If I'm leaving one meeting and need to get into another quickly, I can tap a button and leave a reminder for a teammate I may otherwise forget as I shift gears for the next meeting. It's simple, quick, and a free tool to use!
One important note: This does NOT replace your weekly meeting! My team and I communicate extensively on Voxer. However, we also meet weekly over Zoom.
Weekly Meeting
This is quite possibly the most important meeting of your week! You've done your due diligence to hire well; now it's important to let your new teammate IN! This weekly meeting is where we give and receive feedback, plan and assign new projects, and collaborate (co-labor) on upcoming ideas. This is also the place where you get to know each other and learn one another's work styles! Your weekly meeting is an absolute must and is the one thing that will make or break your virtual team! (55% of communication is body language!)
Slack/Text/Email
Yes, these have a place. My strongest recommendation is to use them sparingly, though. It's great for quick reminders when you can't speak into Voxer or team collaboration with multiple people. My team shares a Team Slack Channel, a Team Voxer channel, and 1:1 channels.
Relying too heavily on text-type communication between team members is a problem we see far too often. Remember, you're asking someone to work within your business! Be sure to empower and equip them the best you can, which means being available and accessible!
Shared document or Project Management Tool
These are essential tools, but let me say this -- it is NOT a communication tool. We love our systems and processes, don't get me wrong! But if you're only checking in with your teammate on Asana, Trello, ClickUp, or any other tool, you're not communicating!
Signing off this month, I want to encourage you! I see AMAZING leadership potential in almost everyone I meet here at Rock Solid. I hear people express the desire to be wonderful teammates each and every day! On the hard days, it's what keeps me coming back. I love to see people find success, growth, and joy in their everyday lives and work - so allow me to encourage you: Do the hard things! …Yes, like communicate! Take the bull by the horns and vow to grow into the leader you were made to be! You've got the tenacity and grit and, most importantly, the heart! I believe in you and can't wait to hear how you've stepped up your communication game this time next month!
Are you still looking for your perfect match? We can help! Let's get you on the schedule so we can see if Rock Solid Virtual Assistants is a good fit for you. Click here to get started!
